Friday, July 28, 2006

The "YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS" Awards




With apologies to and admiration for John McEnroe, whose rendition of "you cannot be serious" is the inspriation for the Award. The following items are so egregious as to merit anger and outrage at that level.

ESPN: for firing Harold Reynolds. YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS. Does Jeff Brantley have a no-fire clause in his contract? Or picture of top-executives of ESPN in compromising positions in his possession? He'd have gone first in my book.

What about the other Yoda wannabe John Kruk? Are we appealing to the much coveted 35-55, spit tobacco swilling, writes with a crayon demographic here? Then he's expendable.

How about Steve Phillips? This guy is giving advice to the Yankees to trade A-Rod? Does he not recall that it was his trade of Scott Kazmir for a box of rocks that resulted in his dismissal from the Mets? This is like Dr. Kervorkian giving advice to the American Medical Association.

How about the ethical wizard Doug Gottlieb. Keep you hand on your wallet when he's on the air that's all anyone can say about this guy.

And how about the fool that is Eric Karros? During a recent Yankees braodcast this fool was tossed a softball question by his play by play man re: whether Yankee captain Derek Jeter should have in some way come to the defense of A-Rod given his recent treatment by Yankes fans. Karros lent nothing, simply regurgitating Jeter's quotes that he doesn't have the cache to chastise Yankee fans. THE HELL HE DOESN'T!!! Let's just count the ways shall we?

1) He's the freaking captain of the team, BE A LEADER!!!
2) this is his supposed good friend as well as teammate (at least that's what we were told when A-Rod came on board)
3) He stood up when Yankee fans gave Jason Giambi what-for after the steroids fiasco. So you can stand up for a cheater and a liar, but not your friend?
4) Pee Wee Reese did as much or more symbollically for Jackie Robinson when Brooklyn Dodger fans treated him like fans on the road where when he first started playing and you best believe it sent a message to Dodger fans and improved things, and I guess, thank God he had the courage to do so.

Derek Jeter: You get a large "YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS" , in my mind, based on words and behavior in l'affaire A-Rod, you go from being the face of baseball to the ass-face of baseball.
Give back the "C" if you don't know how to handle it.

Floyd Landis: Tour de France winner, alleged doper based on the A sample anyway. He claims his testosterone levels are naturally high. Does this give us much hope for the results of the B sample? Or was this sample taken after any event that would have substantially lowered the level enough to pass the test? If you have abnormally high levels naturally, wouldn't you have failed most prior tests? Including the six taken at prior points in the Tour> But you've never failed one in the past right? YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS. OK, Next?

To all the fools at WADA, USADA and any other aphabet soup pseudo-nazi organization that wants to mainstream this type of drug testing protocol not only in all major sports but down to the high school sports level in this country. Let's see if I understand how this works.....You've splashed crimson red paint all over Landis reputation based on his A sample, but wait says one of the experts in the field of cycling, the B sample could test negative and exonerate him.

Presumably it's the same piss, but then what does that say about the test? We still have one positive vs. one negative, of course we exonerate, but then we're back to the damage to his rep appears on page one and the reatraction appears on page ten. And the original stain of the initial charge lingers forever, I repeat FOREVER.

And we want these jack-booted, idiots making policy in this country? I heard one of these talking heads speculating that the positive could have been caused by a) the couple of beers Landis had to rinse away his prior days disappointing performance and b) the coritsone shots he took for his hip. You're going to eliminate most competitors in every major sports league on the basis of those two conditions, I can assure you of that right know.

This same talking head opined that Landis had low testosterone levels but a high ratio of testosterone to epistosterone. First off, what is epistosterone? Regular testosterone gay cousin? And, second Landis comes out the next day saying he had naturally high levels of the big-T. Can't have it both ways, get your stories straight before you go on air please. So here we are in this state of affairs in the sports world, all because white America can't stomach Barry Bonds being the home-run king. YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS.

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Giants Top Minor League Prospects

  • 1. Joey Bart 6-2, 215 C Power arm and a power bat, playing a premium defensive position. Good catch and throw skills.
  • 2. Heliot Ramos 6-2, 185 OF Potential high-ceiling player the Giants have been looking for. Great bat speed, early returns were impressive.
  • 3. Chris Shaw 6-3. 230 1B Lefty power bat, limited defensively to 1B, Matt Adams comp?
  • 4. Tyler Beede 6-4, 215 RHP from Vanderbilt projects as top of the rotation starter when he works out his command/control issues. When he misses, he misses by a bunch.
  • 5. Stephen Duggar 6-1, 170 CF Another toolsy, under-achieving OF in the Gary Brown mold, hoping for better results.
  • 6. Sandro Fabian 6-0, 180 OF Dominican signee from 2014, shows some pop in his bat. Below average arm and lack of speed should push him towards LF.
  • 7. Aramis Garcia 6-2, 220 C from Florida INTL projects as a good bat behind the dish with enough defensive skill to play there long-term
  • 8. Heath Quinn 6-2, 190 OF Strong hitter, makes contact with improving approach at the plate. Returns from hamate bone injury.
  • 9. Garrett Williams 6-1, 205 LHP Former Oklahoma standout, Giants prototype, low-ceiling, high-floor prospect.
  • 10. Shaun Anderson 6-4, 225 RHP Large frame, 3.36 K/BB rate. Can start or relieve
  • 11. Jacob Gonzalez 6-3, 190 3B Good pedigree, impressive bat for HS prospect.
  • 12. Seth Corry 6-2 195 LHP Highly regard HS pick. Was mentioned as possible chip in high profile trades.
  • 13. C.J. Hinojosa 5-10, 175 SS Scrappy IF prospect in the mold of Kelby Tomlinson, just gets it done.
  • 14. Garett Cave 6-4, 200 RHP He misses a lot of bats and at times, the plate. 13 K/9 an 5 B/9. Wild thing.

2019 MLB Draft - Top HS Draft Prospects

  • 1. Bobby Witt, Jr. 6-1,185 SS Colleyville Heritage HS (TX) Oklahoma commit. Outstanding defensive SS who can hit. 6.4 speed in 60 yd. Touched 97 on mound. Son of former major leaguer. Five tool potential.
  • 2. Riley Greene 6-2, 190 OF Haggerty HS (FL) Florida commit.Best HS hitting prospect. LH bat with good eye, plate discipline and developing power.
  • 3. C.J. Abrams 6-2, 180 SS Blessed Trinity HS (GA) High-ceiling athlete. 70 speed with plus arm. Hitting needs to develop as he matures. Alabama commit.
  • 4. Reece Hinds 6-4, 210 SS Niceville HS (FL) Power bat, committed to LSU. Plus arm, solid enough bat to move to 3B down the road. 98MPH arm.
  • 5. Daniel Espino 6-3, 200 RHP Georgia Premier Academy (GA) LSU commit. Touches 98 on FB with wipe out SL.

2019 MLB Draft - Top College Draft Prospects

  • 1. Adley Rutschman C Oregon State Plus defender with great arm. Excellent receiver plus a switch hitter with some pop in the bat.
  • 2. Shea Langliers C Baylor Excelent throw and catch skills with good pop time. Quick bat, uses all fields approach with some pop.
  • 3. Zack Thompson 6-2 LHP Kentucky Missed time with an elbow issue. FB up to 95 with plenty of secondary stuff.
  • 4. Matt Wallner 6-5 OF Southern Miss Run producing bat plus mid to upper 90's FB closer. Power bat from the left side, athletic for size.
  • 5. Nick Lodolo LHP TCU Tall LHP, 95MPH FB and solid breaking stuff.