Sunday, January 27, 2008

PATRIOTS CONTINUE TO MESS WITH THE INJURY REPORT



Coach Bellicheat characteristically taunted the assembled media scribes by letting them know that the Pats injury report would be released for their amusement on Wednesday January 30th as prescribed by the league and not a moment sooner.

Fortunately, we have obtained, from unidentified league sources, the following advance information--submitted by the team--regarding the Patriots starting QB Tom Brady.

Player - Brady, Tom
Position - QB
Injuries or Conditions of Note - Priapism (not responding to treatment), Partially torn testicle (left or non-throwing side), Sebaceous Cyst (not responding to treatment, considerable build-up), minor bladder control issues (season-long condition), Partially dislocated penis (not responding to treatment).
Status: Probable

It's clear that Coach Bellicheat treats the injury report as useless fodder for gamblers and degenerates and simply does not treat it with quite the reverence that the NFL would like.

He's going to play folks. And when the Giants win, the media will treat his dalliances with the "super-model du jour" in much the same manner as Tony Romo's trip to Mexico with his "trophy girlfriend". Which is to say, not very harshly.

Anyway, that twinkle in Brady's eye when he throws a pick is sure to be some off-week flashback to his "date" with whomever he was bringing the flowers to. I say shack up all week Tom, hell don't practice at all, I wouldn't. Show them you are Tom-F**king-Brady and you can do whatever you want. The reports from "the field" regarding Brady's comings and goings sure beat seeing that insufferable "Fourth Brady Boy" vignette that ESPN keeps nauseating us with. Although I could see Marcia getting pounded in the honker with that weak FB toss, all day long. HAHAHA. Like that toss would have caused the kind of swelling they showed later, maybe if she got hit with a baseball bat. I can't believe we bought into that episode. Oh well, we were young.

Anyway, Giants 35 Patriots 34, just so that there is an everlasting reminder to young Tom as to where his focus was, and where it should have been.

Then, after Eli is named Super Bowl MVP, the national sports focus and debate can shift from who is the NFL's biggest slut QB, Romo or Brady, to who is the alpha male in the Manning family, Peyton or Eli?
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Giants Top Minor League Prospects

  • 1. Joey Bart 6-2, 215 C Power arm and a power bat, playing a premium defensive position. Good catch and throw skills.
  • 2. Heliot Ramos 6-2, 185 OF Potential high-ceiling player the Giants have been looking for. Great bat speed, early returns were impressive.
  • 3. Chris Shaw 6-3. 230 1B Lefty power bat, limited defensively to 1B, Matt Adams comp?
  • 4. Tyler Beede 6-4, 215 RHP from Vanderbilt projects as top of the rotation starter when he works out his command/control issues. When he misses, he misses by a bunch.
  • 5. Stephen Duggar 6-1, 170 CF Another toolsy, under-achieving OF in the Gary Brown mold, hoping for better results.
  • 6. Sandro Fabian 6-0, 180 OF Dominican signee from 2014, shows some pop in his bat. Below average arm and lack of speed should push him towards LF.
  • 7. Aramis Garcia 6-2, 220 C from Florida INTL projects as a good bat behind the dish with enough defensive skill to play there long-term
  • 8. Heath Quinn 6-2, 190 OF Strong hitter, makes contact with improving approach at the plate. Returns from hamate bone injury.
  • 9. Garrett Williams 6-1, 205 LHP Former Oklahoma standout, Giants prototype, low-ceiling, high-floor prospect.
  • 10. Shaun Anderson 6-4, 225 RHP Large frame, 3.36 K/BB rate. Can start or relieve
  • 11. Jacob Gonzalez 6-3, 190 3B Good pedigree, impressive bat for HS prospect.
  • 12. Seth Corry 6-2 195 LHP Highly regard HS pick. Was mentioned as possible chip in high profile trades.
  • 13. C.J. Hinojosa 5-10, 175 SS Scrappy IF prospect in the mold of Kelby Tomlinson, just gets it done.
  • 14. Garett Cave 6-4, 200 RHP He misses a lot of bats and at times, the plate. 13 K/9 an 5 B/9. Wild thing.

2019 MLB Draft - Top HS Draft Prospects

  • 1. Bobby Witt, Jr. 6-1,185 SS Colleyville Heritage HS (TX) Oklahoma commit. Outstanding defensive SS who can hit. 6.4 speed in 60 yd. Touched 97 on mound. Son of former major leaguer. Five tool potential.
  • 2. Riley Greene 6-2, 190 OF Haggerty HS (FL) Florida commit.Best HS hitting prospect. LH bat with good eye, plate discipline and developing power.
  • 3. C.J. Abrams 6-2, 180 SS Blessed Trinity HS (GA) High-ceiling athlete. 70 speed with plus arm. Hitting needs to develop as he matures. Alabama commit.
  • 4. Reece Hinds 6-4, 210 SS Niceville HS (FL) Power bat, committed to LSU. Plus arm, solid enough bat to move to 3B down the road. 98MPH arm.
  • 5. Daniel Espino 6-3, 200 RHP Georgia Premier Academy (GA) LSU commit. Touches 98 on FB with wipe out SL.

2019 MLB Draft - Top College Draft Prospects

  • 1. Adley Rutschman C Oregon State Plus defender with great arm. Excellent receiver plus a switch hitter with some pop in the bat.
  • 2. Shea Langliers C Baylor Excelent throw and catch skills with good pop time. Quick bat, uses all fields approach with some pop.
  • 3. Zack Thompson 6-2 LHP Kentucky Missed time with an elbow issue. FB up to 95 with plenty of secondary stuff.
  • 4. Matt Wallner 6-5 OF Southern Miss Run producing bat plus mid to upper 90's FB closer. Power bat from the left side, athletic for size.
  • 5. Nick Lodolo LHP TCU Tall LHP, 95MPH FB and solid breaking stuff.